Singles Counselling and Dating Therapy
Singles Counselling & Dating Therapy

Singles Counselling/Dating Therapy 

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  • Are YOU Feeling Stuck in the Dating World?


  • DO you want to take time and work on yourself before dipping your toe back into the dating pool?


  • D0 you want to understand your attachment style and learn ways to build more of a secure attachment to decrease future conflict in your relationships? 


  • DO you want to heal from past hurts or betrayals and build self-confidence and esteem?


  • DO you want to get clarity on who exactly it is you are looking for, and understand with clarity your needs expectations, and values in a relationship?


  • D0 you need help adapting to being alone and single after a breakup?


  • ARE you frustrated by endless swiping on dating apps without finding a meaningful connection?


  • D0 you struggle to build deep, fulfilling relationships or find yourself repeating patterns that leave you feeling lonely or unfulfilled?



You're not alone, and the good news is that it’s possible to break free


from these cycles.



whatever it is we are here to help!


we offer Expert Singles Counselling/Dating THERAPY:



Singles Counselling/Dating Therapy :  Reconnect with Yourself, and Unlock the Relationship You Desire

Dating in today’s fast-paced, app-driven world can be overwhelming, especially when past relationships and societal pressures cloud your view of love. But the truth is: that forming a healthy, lasting relationship starts with YOU.


In singles counseling, we’ll work with you towards:

  1. Healing past wounds that impact your ability to connect
  2. Building self-love and confidence so you can attract the right partner
  3. Understanding your unique relationship patterns and shifting them for success
  4. Creating a clear vision for the kind of relationship you truly want
  5. Developing the tools to communicate, trust, and grow in healthy partnerships
  6. Understanding yourself better by gaining insight into your past experiences, attachment patterns, and how they affect your relationships.
  7. Overcoming barriers to love by uncovering and addressing the internal obstacles that prevent you from connecting with others in a meaningful way.
  8. Building self-love by learning to cultivate self-compassion, which is essential for attracting healthy, fulfilling relationships.


Singles Counselling looks at the present, and future goals as well as the past and utilizes therapeutic modalities to understand you and your: relationship goals, patterns, self-concept, self-esteem, and values and also looks at past traumas or hurts that may be impacting your dating and or relationships. We also look at attachment theory and styles as well as maslow hierarchy of needs and self-actualization. We focus in on healing as well as helping you understand yourself more, your needs, expectations, self-talk,  hopes, and desires when it comes to love relationships and dating. Singles counselling also touches on past hurts, and betrayals that may need to be processed and grieved as well as help with building self-esteem and confidence.


How Will You Grow, Learn, and Process?

  • Clarity on Your Needs and Desires: Understand what you truly want from relationships and how to communicate those needs effectively.
  • Improved Confidence: Feel empowered in navigating the dating world and forming deeper, healthier connections.
  • Healthier Relationship Habits: Learn tools and strategies for better communication, trust-building, and intimacy.

The Process:

  • Attachment Theory: Explore your attachment style and how it influences your relationships.
  • Past Experiences: Understand how your history shapes your current relationship patterns and beliefs.
  • Skill-Building Exercises: Participate in practical exercises and mental rehearsals to overcome challenges and develop healthier habits.
  • Personal Growth: Work on developing a strong foundation of self-love and emotional resilience.

Solutions & How It Helps:

  • Healing from the Past: Address old wounds that may be affecting your ability to trust and connect with others.
  • Healthy Relationship Patterns: Create new templates for what healthy, lasting relationships look like.
  • Confidence in Dating: Gain the tools and mindset needed to navigate dating with clarity, confidence, and purpose.
  • Long-Term Success: With time and commitment, you’ll be able to form fulfilling connections that align with your goals and values.


Singles counselling digs deeper, helping you heal emotional barriers and develop lasting habits that support meaningful connections. Whether you’re struggling with past heartbreak, feeling undeserving of love, or simply want to improve how you approach relationships, therapy can unlock new possibilities for your love life. We also focus on attachment theory and can help offer strategies and education on anxious, secure, and avoidant attachment styles.


You Deserve Love and Happiness

Singles Counselling/Dating Therapy isn’t just about finding a partner—it's about becoming the best version of yourself in relationships. I’ve helped countless singles break through their dating challenges, and I’m here to support you in creating the fulfilling, healthy relationship you deserve. 


WHO ARE YOUR SESSIONS WITH?

As a couples and family therapist specializing in relationships and attachment theory, I help individuals and couples build healthier, more fulfilling connections. In our singles counselling sessions, we’ll explore your past experiences, patterns of attachment, and the factors that shape how you approach relationships. I believe that self-love is the foundation for forming meaningful partnerships, and I’ll guide you in uncovering and addressing any barriers preventing you from fully trusting and connecting with others.


WHAT DO WE FOCUS ON OR COVER IN OUR SESSIONS?

Through tailored strategies, skill-building exercises, and introspection, I help clients understand their desires, improve communication, and develop healthier relationship habits. You’ll gain clarity on your needs and how to form lasting connections, all while building confidence and self-compassion. The goal is not just to find love, but to transform how you approach relationships—by understanding yourself better and addressing the past so you can move forward with healthier patterns. If you're ready to make lasting changes in how you date and relate to others, I’m here to help guide you through the process.





THERAPY MODALITIES FOR


SINGLES/DATING


COUNSELLING

In dating or singles counseling, therapists may use a variety of models and theories to address different aspects of relationships and personal development. Here are some key ones:


1. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

  • Focus: CBT helps individuals identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors. In dating counseling, it might address unhelpful beliefs about oneself or dating, such as fears of rejection or low self-esteem.
  • Application: Challenging irrational thoughts, setting realistic goals, and developing healthier ways of thinking and behaving in dating scenarios.


2. Attachment Theory

  • Focus: This theory examines how early relationships with caregivers influence one’s patterns in adult relationships. It categorizes attachment styles into secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized.
  • Application: Understanding one's attachment style can provide insights into relationship patterns and help in developing healthier relationship strategies.


3. Imago Relationship Therapy

  • Focus: Imago therapy looks at how unconscious factors from past relationships impact current relationship behaviors and choices.
  • Application: Helping individuals understand their relationship patterns and how past experiences might influence their dating behavior and expectations.


4. Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT)

  • Focus: SFBT is centered on finding solutions rather than focusing on problems. It emphasizes setting goals and exploring what’s already working well.
  • Application: Helping individuals develop practical strategies and solutions for improving their dating experiences and achieving their relationship goals.


5. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

  • Focus: EFT focuses on identifying and changing emotional responses and fostering secure emotional bonds.
  • Application: Enhancing emotional awareness and communication in relationships, which can be particularly useful in understanding and expressing feelings during the dating process.


6. Mindfulness-Based Therapy

  • Focus: This approach uses mindfulness techniques to increase awareness and acceptance of one’s thoughts and feelings.
  • Application: Helping individuals manage dating anxiety, stay present in the moment, and approach dating with a non-judgmental attitude.


7. Narrative Therapy

  • Focus: Narrative therapy explores how individuals create and interpret their personal stories and identities.
  • Application: Encouraging individuals to reframe their dating experiences and stories in ways that support their personal growth and relationship goals.


Each of these models can be adapted to fit the unique needs of individuals in dating or singles counseling, helping them develop healthier relationships and a more fulfilling dating life.



WHAT IS ATTACHMENT THEORY AND WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND YOUR ATTACHMENT STYLE WHEN YOU ARE SINGLE AND DATING? OR IN A NEW RELATIONSHIP OR CURRENT RELATIONSHIP?


Attachment Theory is a psychological framework that explains how early relationships with caregivers shape our emotional bonds and behaviors in later relationships, including romantic ones. It was developed by psychologist John Bowlby and expanded by Mary Ainsworth. According to this theory, the way we were treated as children (especially by primary caregivers) influences how we perceive ourselves, others, and how we connect emotionally in adulthood.


In the context of dating and relationships, attachment theory suggests that people tend to develop one of four attachment styles, which impact how they behave in romantic partnerships:


  1. Secure Attachment: Comfortable with intimacy and trusting of others. Partners with this style tend to have balanced, healthy relationships.

  3. Anxious Attachment: Crave closeness but fear abandonment, often leading to clinginess or excessive worry in relationships.

  5. Avoidant Attachment: Value independence and may distance themselves from their partner emotionally, struggling with closeness and vulnerability.

  7. Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized) Attachment: A mix of anxiety and avoidance, often resulting from past trauma, leading to unpredictable behaviors in relationships.

*Understanding your attachment style—and that of your partner—can provide insight into relationship dynamics, communication patterns, and potential areas of conflict. By becoming aware of these styles, individuals can work towards healthier relationship behaviors, build better emotional connections, and improve their dating experiences.


Examples of strategies to help manage and improve each attachment style:



1. Secure Attachment Style Characteristics:

  • Comfortable with intimacy and emotional closeness.
  • Trusting and confident in relationships.
  • Can communicate needs openly and are responsive to others’ needs.

Strategies for Support:

  • Reinforce Positives: continue fostering healthy communication, mutual respect, and trust.
  • Self-Reflection: while secure individuals tend to thrive in relationships, regular self-reflection and openness to growth can deepen connection even further.

2. Anxious Attachment Style Characteristics:

  • Craves closeness and validation but may fear abandonment.
  • Often preoccupied with relationships and overly sensitive to perceived signs of rejection.
  • Can become emotionally overwhelmed and insecure.

Strategies for Support:

  • Build Self-Esteem: Strengthen personal boundaries and self-worth, independent of a partner’s validation.
  • Mindfulness Practices: Techniques like meditation can help calm anxiety and improve emotional regulation.
  • Communicate Needs Clearly: Learn to express needs and concerns without overwhelming a partner.
  • Seek Reassurance Constructively: Instead of constant reassurance, work on developing confidence in the relationship and self-soothing strategies.

3. Avoidant Attachment Style Characteristics:

  • Values independence and often distances themselves emotionally.
  • Can struggle with intimacy and feel uncomfortable with too much closeness.
  • Tends to downplay emotions and avoid vulnerability.
  • Gradual Vulnerability: Practice opening up gradually to partners, starting with small, safe emotional disclosures.
  • Challenge Fear of Dependency

Strategies for Support:

  •   healthy relationships support and allow for both autonomy and connection.
  • Stay Engaged: Avoid retreating when emotions arise; instead, work on staying present in relationships, even when it feels uncomfortable.
  • Therapy or Self-Reflection: Address the deeper fears that fuel the avoidance, often tied to past rejection or trauma.

4. Fearful-Avoidant (Disorganized) Attachment Style  Characteristics:

  • Experiences a mix of anxiety and avoidance—craving connection but also fearing it.
  • Can exhibit inconsistent behaviors (e.g., seeking closeness, then pulling away) and struggle with emotional regulation.
  • Often a result of past trauma or inconsistent caregiving in childhood.

Strategies for Support:

  • Create Safe, Predictable Relationships: Engage in relationships that offer consistency and security, which can help reduce fear and confusion.
  • Process Past Trauma: Work through past wounds with a therapist to better understand the root causes of fear and inconsistency.
  • Practice Emotional Regulation: Learn tools for managing intense emotions, such as deep breathing or grounding techniques.
  • Build Trust Slowly: Be patient and allow relationships to develop at a comfortable pace, avoiding pressure.

Examples of General Strategies to Improve Attachment Styles:

  • Therapy: Working with a therapist can help individuals understand their attachment style and work toward healthier relationship patterns.
  • Mindfulness and Self-Compassion: Practices that help improve self-awareness, emotional regulation, and compassion for oneself can be beneficial.
  • Open Communication: Regardless of attachment style, learning to communicate openly and vulnerably with partners can deepen trust and understanding.
  • Develop Healthy Boundaries: For all styles, understanding and setting healthy boundaries is key to fostering mutual respect and long-term relationship success.

By recognizing your attachment style and applying targeted strategies, you can improve your relationships and emotional well-being.


CALL US TODAY to book a session or for more information on any of these styles and to learn how to integrate these strategies into your life. We also offer group seminars online and in person (see below)




DATING WORKSHOP

Are you single and looking for love? Are you not quite ready to trust again? Are you afraid of being vulnerable or rejected? Maybe you just went through a divorce or breakup, and the thought of dating again seems exhausting, daunting, and overwhelming. Or perhaps you don't want to keep repeating the same patterns in your relationships or attracting toxic partners Or wasting your time with partners that are just not the right match for you!


HERE IS JUST SOME OF WHAT YOU WILL LEARN IN THIS 2HR WORKSHOP:

  • Learn 5 key dating skills to avoid frustration or burnout and not waste your time
  • Address any fears of intimacy or putting yourself out there and replace them with more calming opening thoughts and strategies for dating
  • Create a clear picture and list of what you are looking for in a partner that aligns with your future goals and personal values
  • Learn how to cultivate an attitude of attraction
  • Identify prior negative dating or relationship patterns and ways to address them and adopt healthy ones
  • Understand and identify red flags so you don't enter into a relationship that is toxic or not healthy for you
  • Understand what you may bring into a relationship that may or may not be healthy
  • Understand your attachment style (attend follow up workshop to learn more about your attachment style and secure attachment)


COST: $18888845970hr workshop with exercises + questionnaires


Three questionnaires are provided to help you identify:


  1. Roles and expectations you bring to a relationship and how they align with your potential partner’s roles
  2. Qualities you seek in a partner
  3. Assess what you value most in a relationship, which can reflect how your values influence your mate selection.
  4. Attachment Style Questionnaire




ANXIOUSLY ATTACHED


SEMINAR

Do you spin out of control when someone doesn't call you or check in? Do you txt a lot and express how you feel to someone only to not get the same back and feel down about yourself? Do you need constant affirmation from your partner so that you feel ok in a relationship? Perhaps you are anxiously attached and you don't want to feel that stress, anxiety in your stomach when it comes to beginning to date or trust in a relationship.


Maybe you're in a relationship and feel anxiety or worry is impacting your relationship in not a great way and your not liking the way it shows up perhaps as anger, resentment or even guilting your partner.


It's ok your not alone many of us are anxiously attached.


People with an anxious attachment style often exhibit certain behaviors in relationships that can be destructive or problematic. These behaviors generally stem from fears of abandonment and a strong desire for closeness. Here are some common destructive behaviors associated with anxious attachment that perhaps you recognize in yourself:


1. Excessive Reassurance Seeking

  • Constantly Seeking Validation: Frequently asking for reassurance or affirmation from their partner, which can create pressure and strain.
  • Frequent Contact: Over-texting or calling their partner to seek constant reassurance and attention.

2. Overreacting to Perceived Threats

  • Misinterpreting Signals: Reading too much into small or ambiguous actions of their partner, leading to misunderstandings and unnecessary conflict.
  • Overreacting to Minor Issues: Amplifying minor disagreements or issues into major conflicts, often driven by fears of rejection or abandonment.

3. Clinginess and Dependency

  • Excessive Dependence: Relying heavily on their partner for emotional support and validation, which can create an imbalanced dynamic.
  • Difficulty Being Alone: Struggling to spend time apart or being alone, leading to feelings of insecurity and heightened anxiety.

4. Jealousy and Possessiveness

  • Insecurity About Relationships: Displaying jealousy or possessiveness over their partner’s interactions with others due to fear of being replaced or abandoned.
  • Checking Behaviors: Engaging in behaviors like snooping or excessive questioning to check on their partner’s fidelity or commitment.

5. Over-Dependence on Communication

  • Need for Immediate Responses: Becoming anxious or upset if their partner doesn’t respond to messages or calls quickly.
  • Over-Analyzing Communication: Obsessively analyzing their partner’s words or actions to find hidden meanings or potential issues.

6. Fear of Rejection

  • Preemptive Withdrawal: Withdrawing or pushing their partner away preemptively to avoid potential rejection or abandonment.
  • Self-Sabotage: Engaging in behaviors that create conflict or drive a wedge between them and their partner, often driven by fears of eventual rejection.

7. High Sensitivity to Partner’s Behavior

  • Hyper-Sensitivity: Being overly sensitive to their partner’s moods or behaviors, leading to frequent anxiety and worry.
  • Interpreting Ambiguity Negatively: Assuming the worst about their partner’s intentions or feelings, even when there is no clear evidence.

8. Unresolved Past Issues

  • Bringing Up Past Conflicts: Rehashing old conflicts or past grievances, which can prevent the relationship from moving forward and lead to repeated arguments.
  • Unresolved Trauma: Projecting unresolved personal issues or past relationship traumas onto the current relationship, affecting trust and stability.

9. Difficulty Setting Boundaries

  • Neglecting Personal Needs: Sacrificing personal needs and desires to accommodate their partner’s needs or to maintain the relationship, which can lead to resentment and burnout.
  • Lack of Self-Care: Neglecting self-care or personal interests in favor of focusing solely on the relationship, which can create an unhealthy dynamic.

10. Inconsistent Behavior

  • Instability: Exhibiting unpredictable or inconsistent behavior due to fluctuating levels of anxiety or fear, which can lead to confusion and instability in the relationship.
  • Emotional Rollercoaster: Creating a rollercoaster of emotions by swinging between high levels of closeness and withdrawal, impacting relationship stability.


Recognizing these behaviors and understanding their underlying causes can help individuals with an anxious attachment style work towards healthier relationship dynamics. Engaging in therapy or self-help strategies to address these patterns can also be beneficial in fostering more balanced and fulfilling relationships.


Individuals with an anxious attachment style often experience heightened sensitivity to relationship dynamics, including fears of abandonment and a strong desire for closeness. To build balanced, secure, and fulfilling relationships, this 6 week course will focus on key strategies and steps to help anxious style of attachment:


By incorporating these strategies, individuals with an anxious attachment style can work towards more secure, balanced, and fulfilling relationships, ultimately leading to greater emotional stability and satisfaction.



AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT 



SEMINAR

Do you withdraw, avoid intimacy and are left with a frustrated partner or perhaps you have always found it hard to have an emotionally intimate connected relationship? When conversations around emotions and getting to a deeper level of discussion vs surface things or daily tasks come up do you retreat or shut down?


It's ok your not alone many of us are avoidant attached.


People with avoidant attachment styles often exhibit certain behaviors in relationships that can be destructive or problematic. These behaviors typically stem from a deep-seated discomfort with closeness and dependence. Here are some common destructive behaviors associated with avoidant attachment:


1. Emotional Distance

  • Withdrawing: They may pull away or become distant when their partner seeks emotional intimacy, leading to a lack of connection.
  • Minimal Sharing: They often keep their feelings and thoughts to themselves, making it hard for their partner to understand them.

2. Avoiding Conflict

  • Stonewalling: They might shut down or refuse to engage in discussions about issues or conflicts, avoiding confrontation and resolution.
  • Dismissiveness: They may downplay or dismiss their partner’s concerns and emotions, which can invalidate their partner's feelings.

3. Overemphasis on Independence

  • Self-Reliance: They prioritize independence to the extent that they avoid relying on or being emotionally available to their partner.
  • Avoiding Dependence: They may resist or reject help, support, or closeness, fearing it will lead to loss of autonomy.

4. Fear of Intimacy

  • Pushing Partners Away: They might engage in behaviors that push their partner away when the relationship gets too close or intimate.
  • Preemptive Withdrawal: They may preemptively end relationships or distance themselves to avoid potential rejection or vulnerability.

5. Inconsistency

  • Hot and Cold Behavior: They may alternate between being warm and distant, creating confusion and instability in the relationship.
  • Unpredictable Communication: They might be inconsistent in their communication, causing frustration and uncertainty for their partner.

6. Difficulty with Commitment

  • Reluctance to Commit: They often struggle with making long-term commitments or defining the relationship clearly, avoiding the responsibilities of a serious relationship.
  • Fear of Closeness: They may resist moving the relationship forward, fearing that commitment will lead to loss of freedom.

7. Avoiding Vulnerability

  • Defensiveness: They might be defensive or quick to protect themselves rather than being open and vulnerable.
  • Guardedness: They keep their guard up to avoid being hurt or rejected, which can hinder genuine connection.

8. Difficulty with Emotional Expression

  • Lack of Emotional Feedback: They may not provide emotional feedback or support to their partner, making it hard for their partner to feel valued or understood.
  • Intellectualizing Feelings: They may discuss feelings in a detached, intellectual manner rather than expressing them emotionally.


These behaviors can create significant challenges in relationships, often leading to misunderstandings, conflicts, and a sense of emotional distance. Understanding these patterns and working with a therapist can help individuals with avoidant attachment develop healthier relationship dynamics.


This seminar will address key strategies avoidant attached people can do to improve their relationship dynamics and foster healthier, more fulfilling relationships.



By incorporating these strategies, individuals with an avoidant attachment style can work towards creating more balanced, secure, and fulfilling relationships.






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